Arguing With Your Parents

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Don’t get along with your parents or guardians? Often arguing and feel that they don’t understand you? Are you asking yourself, “why don’t they see things the way I do?”

Families sometimes disagree with each other and the occasional tension or argument is part of family life. However, ongoing arguments and tension can be stressful and overwhelming. Some people lose their temper and become intentionally hurtful, aggressive or even violent. But there are ways to defuse the conflict and help bring about a peaceful result. Here are a few things you can do:

Talk to someone outside the situation. People you can talk to include a counselor, friend, brother or sister, or teacher.

Count to 10 before responding. It might sound silly, but walking away and counting to 10 can be a good way to cool off anger and avoid a response that could make the situation worse.

Get some space from the situation—while not solving the problem—it can be good to get some space and avoid more arguments. This might include exercising or chilling out with your friends.

Talking it out with your parents or guardians, could ease the situation. It can also be a great way of sorting through issues and coming to an arrangement that works for all of you.

Agreeing to disagree. If you simply cannot find a way to compromise, you might find you have to ‘agree to disagree’. Remember that you can have your own opinions, based on your own experience, beliefs and values - whether or not you accept your parents’ or guardians’ views is up to you.

Acknowledgement: This fact sheet was originally developed by youth and staff at ReachOut.com, a website that helps teens get through tough times. 

Dear Auntie, How can I help my friend, who is feeling helpless? Her parents are going through a divorce.

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