I grew up in an urban city in Oklahoma. I want to move back to my ancestral lands, but I’m scared of not being accepted by my relations back home. How do I confront this fear?

Thanks for writing in. I find your journey incredibly brave and exciting!

It seems like you have a strong idea or expectation of what will happen if you move home. Take time to think about what is it exactly that you want. What are you hoping to gain from moving back home? Do you have to be home in order to achieve this?

There’s no way of knowing how something will turn out, but it’s important to first think about what it is that you want – what are your goals, so that you can figure out what paths will help you to get there.

Unfortunately the path is never crystal clear, but be assured that there’s no right or wrong way of getting there. If you’re journey to being closer to your culture has you connecting in other ways than living on your ancestral lands, know that that’s okay…you’re still working towards your goals.

If you haven’t spent a lot of time on your ancestral lands, do that. Plan a road trip with some friends or your family members who can share with you your culture. Do a little research and see if there are any museums, events, or a library you can visit. You can check with your tribal office for this. The more time you spend at home, the more you will discover, the more people you will meet and therefore the more relationships you will form. You will also get a clearer idea of what you want to do.

If your journey takes you to moving home, find peace in knowing that there are people who will welcome you, as long as you come with respect and humility. If your journey lies somewhere else, know that that is okay too.

I applaud you for seeking out and discovering more about who you are.

Best of luck!

Aunty Manda


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