Q: What does a healthy Relationship look like to you?
I want to start by saying that I have not had enough examples of healthy relationships in my life. But I have seen beautiful, beautiful relationships and I’ve always wondered, you know, what that was like and what that meant.
I’ve had some experience with good relationships and whatnot, but for me, I truly believe that in order to have a healthy relationship, you have to have a healthy relationship with yourself first. To do that it’s important to heal the parts of you that need healing by getting the support and help that you need. And, if perhaps therapy isn’t your thing, then you’re finding the proper coping mechanisms to help you battle some of those demons or some of those things that are holding you back from being the best version of yourself.
I like to think about doing the work to break these cycles to make sure that I’m a healthy person. So that when I am in a relationship, it is healthy because if not an unhealthy relationship can truly take away so much from your life. This is something that I’ve learned. I’ve had to learn not to allow those toxic relationships continue because they can take away from the most beautiful moments in my life.
By focusing on your health and making sure you’re in a good place so that when you show up in a relationship that you’re your best self for both yourself and your partner. And, making sure that it is returned to you too.
You also have the right to have high standards. You have the right to have boundaries that you create through knowing yourself; what you do and don’t want. Stay strong with that and don’t allow yourself to settle for less because there are people out there that want to treat you the way you deserve to be treated. There is someone out there who wants to do the most for you and that’s what you deserve.
By knowing your worth your life will be richer on its own. And when you do find an equal partner, which you don’t technically need, but having each other in each other’s lives makes life beautiful and doesn’t add any stress. And that you are supporting each other in the ways that you each need. It’s not one way or one sided. It’s an equal partnership.
You know what I mean?
It’s like taking a moment, if you need to, and step back and evaluate if you’re showing up the best way you can for yourself and your partner right now. It’s good to always give yourself the space you need to grow into the best version of yourself.
So yeah, I truly believe it all starts with you and your healing journey. Know that if you’re healthy on your own you can be in healthy relationship moving forward; treating yourself and your partner with equal respect.
Take care,
Sister Q
Quannah ChasingHorse
