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Hello. My name is Maya. I’m half black and half Native American but I struggle with my Native American heritage. My mother has light eyes and light skin, almost white. What should I do if we both don’t feel native enough? My grandparents had more NA fts

Hi Maya. You’re not alone in feeling this way. I have people write to me all the time about not feeling “Native enough”. Being half-Zuni, I have felt this myself. What I can tell you, is that you are enough… of everything. Many people of different backgrounds share this experience.…
Answered by Auntie Manda
Topics: Culture and Language, Identity

How do I become a pow wow fancy shawl dancer ? I am 18 and I know how to dance inter tribal dances and my mom was a jingle dress dancer when she was younger and my grandmother was a fancy shawl dancer, how do I register?

Go you! The first thing I would encourage you to do is to get a mentor. This person can help guide you through all the things you’ll need to get started. They can coach you on regalia making, dancing with the traditions of style, meaning, and etiquette. Though you might…
Answered by Auntie Manda
Topics: Culture and Language, Identity

Hi Auntie! My name is Sophia and I’m just curious to know if my really Yaqui descendent. There is only one problem : I live in Germany. Is there a way to get DNA test and send it from here? Or should I have to be in the US for this?

Hi Sophia! It sounds like you’ve heard from someone that you may be Yaqui… pretty cool! If you’re looking to find out more, see if you can get more information from the person/ people you heard this from. Asking around is great way to discover more about your lineage. If…
Answered by Auntie Manda
Topics: Culture and Language, Identity

Hi Auntie. A family member recently went to Wyoming and took a picture of a sign named "Vision Quest Motel". My family is in an argument about whether the sign is racist or not. I don’t know what to think. Is it racist?

This is a great question and I appreciate you asking it. It shows that you respect and appreciate Native culture. Being from the Southwest (Zuni Pueblo, NM), I often saw Native designs displayed in various ways by Native and non-Native people. As we move forward as a society, we are…
Answered by Auntie Manda
Topics: Activism, Education, Identity, Intolerance, Non-Native Allies

Hi auntie. Me and my boyfriend of over a year just broke up and I have to see him at school everyday. I’ve started to have thoughts about hurting myself cause the pain of us breaking up hurts so much what do I do!

If you are feeling suicidal you should call 911 immediately, or the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255), or a mental health professional you can find through your tribal clinic, or school counselor. You’re doing the right thing now by reaching out. When someone tells me they are thinking…
Answered by Auntie Manda
Topics: Identity, Mental Health, Relationships

Your male friend tells you that he had an unwanted sexual experience when he was younger with someone he looked up to. He questions if it was sexual assault because he was sexually aroused during the interaction. what do you do?

Some possible options (depending on your comfort and his openness to further discussion) include: Offer encouragement for his willingness to consider a challenging question. Listen neutrally. Avoid defining what happened for him. Explore whether he feels there was a power imbalance in the relationship. Who has the power? Offer to…
Answered by Cousin Lael
Topics: Identity, Intolerance, Mental Health

I grew up in an urban city in Oklahoma. I want to move back to my ancestral lands, but I’m scared of not being accepted by my relations back home. How do I confront this fear?

Thanks for writing in. I find your journey incredibly brave and exciting! It seems like you have a strong idea or expectation of what will happen if you move home. Take time to think about what is it exactly that you want. What are you hoping to gain from moving…
Answered by Auntie Manda
Topics: Culture and Language, Identity, Intolerance, Mental Health, Non-Native Allies, Spirituality
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