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I feel like I don’t belong in my tribe

As someone who supports urban natives and advocates for their well-being, I understand the complexity of your situation and the sense of disconnection you’re experiencing. It can be challenging to navigate one’s identity and sense of belonging, especially when cultural traditions and teachings have not been passed down within the…
Answered by Guest Relative, Sutton King
Topics: Identity

I don’t feel very feminine these days and so I am wondering if it would be disrespectful for a woman to wear a ribbon shirt as opposed to a ribbon skirt? I’m sure other folks might also wonder about the reverse. Would you have to identify as Two-spirit?

Hi there, Thanks for writing in! For these types of questions, I want to be transparent in that I may not provide a traditional, straightforward answer, but instead be here as support and validation in you coming to that answer yourself. 🙂 When it comes to these types of things,…
Answered by Cousin Asia
Topics: 2SLGBTQ, Culture and Language, Identity

Dear Relatives, I have recently started to seriously try to reconnect with my Choctaw culture. Something complicates my existence is the fact that I’m transgender. Perhaps, this is another reason why I feel lost. Not only do I want to feel like a whole woman, I want to feel like a whole person. Anyway, do you have any advice?

Hi there, Halito relative! Yakoke for writing in – I always get a lil extra excited when I see other Choctaws reach out 🙂 Let’s see where I can support you! I definitely want to acknowledge what youv’e written, because there’s so much there – goodness. I want to give…
Answered by Cousin Asia
Topics: 2SLGBTQ, Identity, Intolerance, Mental Health, Spirituality

I am a white woman of Ukrainian descent who has been involved in aboriginal ceremonies for the past 12 years. I have been so grateful to have more recently participated in a Ghost Dance and a Sun Dance and a Yuwipi ceremony. I am always careful to honour protocol and wear an appropriate long skirt (hard being 6 feet tall to find one long enough!). I have wanted to be as respectful as possible. I am curious if making a ribbon skirt or a dress to do Ghost Dance is allowed for a participant if they are not native. I have received very mixed messages. Some aboriginal people welcome it and find it extremely respectful and others have said it is appropriation. I feel the only dresses that are suitably long and modest are often from another culture- African, Mexican- unless I make something myself. Can you share your thoughts with me?

I’m glad you asked this question, Please continue to take these precautions and ask these questions, as a non native interested in another culture’s traditional artwork. Good to hear that you have respect for other Native cultures, and coming from being Native there are several things to be aware of.…
Answered by Auntie Manda
Topics: Identity, Intolerance, Non-Native Allies

I am from what I know a primarily white woman with a 1/ 4 Portuguese mixed. I am definitely attracted to native men. I was with a Native American Women’s Riding club and who’s is the Sister club of red rum. I am drawn to the culture, traditions, oral history and want to learn more. I am single and would love to meet some Native men in my are that are actively involved with their culture. I know there are Native dating sites out there but not sure how that would be received. If I joined one would it be disrespectful as I have never taken a DNA test and know my full genetic make up. Thanks for your support

Hi there! Thanks for reaching out, glad to help answer your question. Firstly, it’s important to realize that your preference of attraction is totally up to you, and it’s something that’s personal to each individual. There’s no problem in wanting to learn more about Native Culture as well if you…
Answered by Auntie Manda
Topics: Identity, Non-Native Allies

Hi Auntie! I’m a white Canadian citizen and I was wondering if it is disrespectful of me or if I am overstepping my boundaries by dating someone who is indigenous? I’ve dated someone for a couple of years who was indigenous and we got along very well, but his mother and friends were not welcoming to our relationship and neither was my mother. His mother preferred that he end up with an indigenous woman in his future and my mom the opposite with me being white. I ended up breaking off our relationship because I didn’t want to cause any hardship between him and his mother and friends, but it really broke my heart because he was also my best friend not just my partner since we were best friends since middle school

Hi there! Thanks for the question. When it comes to relationships like these, it sometimes happens that one or both sides of a family do not approve of the union – it’s tough. Unfortunately, this approval should never have anything to do with the color of someone’s skin. So long…
Answered by Auntie Manda
Topics: Identity, Intolerance, Non-Native Allies
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